FAKE IT 'TIL I MAKE IT

I threw a launch party to celebrate the birth of my first born, my self-made, dream come true, brand. Looking back at the event, I can not be more thrilled with how it went. The outpouring of love and support has truly been an overwhelming experience and I am still sending my gratitude out to the universe for it – thank you!

The scene was set and I was ready early, just as I planned. I had my launch event’s signature “Blondetini” cocktail in one hand, my cell phone in the other, while wearing my new dress with a fresh bombshell blowout.

But it turned out to be a weirdly, awkward moment. When I realized I was standing. Alone. In a bar. With my face, social media accounts, and business cards splattered all over an unfilled room.

That’s when she arrived. The one guest I did not expect to see, Doubt. She entered the room and immediately stole the show. She laughed at my raffle baskets, scoffed at my makeshift photo booth, and stomped on a fallen business card.

She strutted up to me and intruded my head with antagonizing questions: “Do you really think this brand will actually take off? “Who do you think you are?” “Why are you even doing this?”

That’s when this morning’s butterflies turned into Jurassic Park raptors. Doubt was getting exactly what she wanted from me. The worried look, the particles of sweat, and the thought that people might not take this seriously.

I anxiously looked at my phone and realized it was show time. Actually INVITED guests would be arriving any minute. But Doubt, the raptors, the worrisome sweat did not make me feel party ready and they needed to disappear.

That’s when I decided to take on my “fake it ‘til you make it” defense mechanism. Just like when we were little and we used to play “Pretend,” I, an adult now, started to play. I decided to take on another persona. I Sabrina The Teenage Witched myself into Bethenny Frankle, my career idol and inspiration. In that magical moment I felt like her, thought like her, and acted like her. And instantly I was even more party ready than before.

Next thing I know, I was sternly asking Doubt to “get off my jock” and she vanished out the door. I took a sip of my “Blondetini”, threw on some gloss, and I was back and ready – but this time as Bethenny. I felt powerful, beautiful, and bold – ready for the event to start and I completely forgot Doubt ever showed up.

Just as my friends and fellow business women of Hoboken began to fill the room, my confidence and my self satisfaction was oozing out. Everyone was enjoying themselves and better yet, so was I! That’s when I realized that Bethenny had left just shortly after Doubt and I was actually playing the role of myself. The role of the woman who thoughtfully crafted every detail of their brand and launch party. The woman who dreamt of this day. The woman who wants to be someone else’s pretend persona.

I find that it’s sometimes easier to pretend to be someone else in an uncomfortable situation. It’s that security of not being in our own skin and taking on the role of someone we look up to. We did it when we were younger, so why not try it now? My personal favorites are Bethenny and Katy Perry!

I recommend to try this little tip out the next time you need help conquering any type of uncomfortable situation.  Whether it’s a job interview, a first date, or a party that you really don’t want to be at – pretend to be someone that motivates you. It’s a simple mind trick that can turn any situation into a success. And you’ll surprise yourself – you may find that J-Lo helped you get to the date but she really also allowed your true self to open up and enjoy it and take part in the new activity.